Precipitation

This is not precipitation of the ‘rain’ kind – it is of a different kind –

It’s been a day of being at home after being away for several days and settling in and attending to my study. I was scratching in a desk drawer for something and pulled out a scrap of paper, undated ..

It was/is a precipitation in my writing – on the back of a torn envelope –

Prayers:

for Christopher to know that he can return to who he essentially is, a good and caring doctor. And if not in the way he was before, then in some other way.

I pray that he regains his self-regard.

I pray that he does not hide behind depression.

I pray that he pays real soulful attention to himself.

                                                                                             x x x x x x x x x x x x

Many many years ago, at a guess I would say 20 years, my good friend who knows Christopher said about precipitation and that she had used it effectively on occasion, for her father if I remember correctly who was unwell. It was the first I’d heard of it. She is a science prof, so not in any way ‘woo woo’.  She did one for Christopher at that time. I’ve done a few over the years. And now I find myself taking this up again.

This one appears to be the only one I’ve retained. I’m paying attention to the timing of finding this old one with regard to other friends, not necessarily those with depression or with Christopher’s particular afflictions. I bought a pretty note book at a fair in the suburbs of Cape Town earlier this month and I’m using a separate page for each of those I know who are in some sort of crisis, soul and/or body wise. My sister for her ankle that is taking a long time healing and is painful. My neighbour who had a hip operation last week; my friend from Cape Town who had surgery recently here in Johannesburg to remove a basal carcinoma very close/behind her eye; another friend in Cape Town who is recovering from a hip operation; a friend here in Johannesburg whose husband committed suicide 2 years ago – the anniversary is this Sunday; another local, dear friend who is in the depths of despair and feels her soul is no longer alive. There are a few more – I’m writing out precipitations for them each. I saw on a google search that it is a form of intercession. Or prayer if you will … on behalf of another –

There’s something about putting my ‘precipitations’ down on paper and reading them daily or nightly or whenever as a prayer – into the atmosphere –

I am home, back from my Somerset West school re-union held near Stellenbosch/Somerset West (outside of Cape Town) in a lovely restaurant earlier this month. I had my hair cut and bleached while there – the day after I arrived – in parts (strand by strand) to begin the process of going au naturel – going grey naturally (hopefully gracefully). If this first step is anything to go by, I like it a lot. It’s an excellent cut and I like the grey/silver with the brown. Others who’ve seen it like it too. A few with fulsome praises – I enjoy an ego stroke every now and then, even if transient!

My Cape Town visit was very special on many levels. I saw 4 precious friends, 3 of whom schlepped a fair distance to come and visit me in the suburbs at my sister’s home for which I was and am very grateful. The school re-union was lovely – people I have not seen for 50 years! People came from far and wide, Australia, Canada, UK, Namibia and locally of course. Being with my sister was very special. She faithfully and arduously conserves water because of the severe drought and water shortage in Cape Town. All water is recycled. I got a shower down to 2 mins max. Water from the shower into the loo .. not a drop is wasted. Dishwashing water, much else. My sister’s daughter’s small sons are a delight. I feel privileged to be great aunt to them. Last Tuesday night my younger son and his wife came for dinner, as did my niece and her sons, my sister’s son and my brother’s son – 

We visited ZeitzMOCAA (Museum of Contemporary Art Africa) last week the day before I flew home.  It is an extraordinary structure at the Cape Town Waterfront (the link https://zeitzmocaa.museum/  will show a few pictures under ‘Exhibition’). It’s hailed as The Tate of Africa. It is a refurbishment of silos and turbines and is now a magnificent architectural delight with 6 stories of enormous rooms containing art from all parts of Africa. It was officially opened in October. My sister and I met Robert there last Wednesday. He’s a classmate of mine from 50 years ago. He lives in Sydney where he is a forensic psychiatrist. Here we’re having an iced coffee after roaming the museum.

This is my photo of a bronze entitled ‘Zeus’ in the museum –

It’s raining as I write late-ish this Tuesday night – crashing thunder and lightning about. I hope it’s going to be a jolly good downpour. The distinct smell of rain in the air is called ‘petrichor’ and/or it’s the earthy smell after rains have soaked the dry earth. It’s hot here up on the high veld in Johannesburg. May rains come wherever they are needed.  I’ve added that to my precipitation list especially for where the drought is dire –

Thank you for reading. May this find you well. I pray for peace in this troubled world of ours and pray also that we each somehow manage to manoeuvre these trying times. May The Force be with you all.

Beauty

I went for a walk earlier this evening/late afternoon – the first two are from just outside my garden wall –

I enjoyed my walk – I usually have to force myself to do this. My innate slothful tendencies are ever present. My younger son David who is visiting, and I went for a walk yesterday late afternoon. I said to him how I have to FORCE myself to walk sometimes. He said how it is that that which you least want to do is the very thing that must be done. That resistance to doing what needs to be done, is a very real something (most often unconscious), and can emphasise or bring to attention that which needs attention – and I have to ask myself what is my resistance and my avoidance really all about. The question of why I do not do what needs be done – reminds me of St. Paul’s letter to the Romans ..

This evening’s walk was also an attempt to keep up my daily walking average as recorded on my cell phone (an app on my phone my elder son showed me how to use when he was here recently, also visiting). I checked it when I thought I had done x amount of steps this evening, but I was still short, so I did some more walking and then walked around the complex where I live. It was now night-time. This yesterday today and tomorrow (Oxford & Cambridge) is on the other side close to my kitchen – there was a lamp in the garden shining on it so I took a photo, admired and sniffed its glorious scent.

Tonight’s moon is resting on her bottom in the night sky peeking and waxing between the branches of the jacaranda tree (soon to bloom) that leans over our garage –

We were in Plett last week  – I photographed this below picture of this very large log from many angles on my phone. I wonder where it came from? Washed up? Put there as a work of art? Land Art?

The below photo was while on a walk on the beach in Plett on a different day – it was rather mystical to see the mist pouring in …

I have a need on my side to put up a post now. The #WATWB post is due this coming Friday. We post on the last Friday of every month. I must go in search of a good news story in the next few days. But these photos I wanted to share in the meantime –

I’m writing this from the balcony of our home in Plettenberg Bay. The sunrise shows part of the bay and the Tsitsikama mountains. I’m hoping to see whales. We arrived here in Plett on Sunday afternoon after flying into George International Airport from Johannesburg. A week’s break –

So far a mixture of busy-ness and not so busy. Right now I’ve got the covers of sitting room and balcony furniture in the washing machine, some already out on the line. I’m wondering whether my need to have clean sofa covers and cushions has something to do with the new moon. Maybe. Maybe in preparation for what the new moon foretells, and along with it the Equinox; Spring Equinox for us in the southern hemisphere, Autumnal/ Fall Equinox for those in northern climes –

and Rosh Hashanah also …

Does each have any meaning to me? And especially all of them altogether?

I’m wondering whether seeing our son’s new home yesterday in his absence to air it but also to look at it anew, has something to do with wanting things to be fresh and clean in our own home. His home is so lovely, pristine, minimalistic (though not overly), contained yet spacious and the garden is a delight. No wonder he loves his home – I’m sure he’s missing it already and can’t wait to be home from Canada where he is at the moment attending an international animation meeting.

I took a couple of photos yesterday of his garden. I wish I could tell you the name of the plants. The golden and orange ones are extraordinary – I think indigenous. All I know is that the red one is a bottle brush.

These personal events that coincide with outer events give me cause for pause. The Equinox holds a fascination for me. A moment when the opposites of day and night come into play and are of equal length. A moment of balance.  A moment before the earth tilts on its axis. It’s representative of so much to me – the never-ending rhythmic cycles of our planet, the shortening or lengthening of the days and nights, my awareness of the passage of time, my self within ‘time’ as I know it and an awareness of its limit in terms of my life left to live –

And this morning a new moon which may be visible tonight.  The moon will be in its waxing phase for the next two weeks. A good time to plant – seeds of whatever kind – love, patience, kindness, joy are a few that come to mind – anything that blossoms in receptive and fertile soil.

This evening, Rosh Hashanah (Jewish New Year) begins at sunset and ends at sunset on Friday (although I think there is a prescription that Rosh Hashanah should never begin on a Wednesday?) Apples eaten with honey is symbolic of wishing everyone a sweet and prosperous year. The Shofar announcing Rosh Hashanah is trumpeted at sunset this evening …

For me, these coinciding events have an imaginative meaning – a moment of stillness as the opposites come into play, a forward tilting, a renewal as the soil is continually tilled.

Thank you for reading, a very happy New Year if you are welcoming it in, a blessed new moon, and likewise with the Equinox.

This that & the next thing –

Spring is sprung. It’s lovely to see buds beginning to bloom in my small garden. My orchids are flourishing, the azaleas are lovely, the yesterday today and tomorrow (Oxford & Cambridge) are releasing their lovely scent from their violet and white flowers, I see the occasional bee, birds landing in the bird bath, the jacarandas over the wall which I can see from my study are greening, my roses pruned in late July are beginning to shoot, my clivias are joyous, the days are longer and warmer.

My son Dave and his lovely wife Jüte have been here in Johannesburg for the last few days, flying back to Cape Town early tomorrow morning. Jüte put up the link below for me yesterday. Tamara LePine – Williams, the morning radio host of Classic FM, invited us to their studios for an off-air interview with me and Susan Schwartz, when Susan was here in Johannesburg from Paradise Valley Az. The producer of Tamara’s Wednesday book show slot had requested some weeks prior a copy of our co-authored book ‘Aging & Becoming ~ A Reflective Enquiry’ for review.

I was sent the link the day after it was it was broadcast almost two weeks ago. It is only with Jüte’s help that I am able to put it up. It’s just over 13 mins long. It begins with a little music.

Politically, all is still pretty hay-wire here in South Africa. The end of this year sees the governing political party putting forth their candidates for the 2019 elections. The opposition parties will be doing the same. We hope many of them join forces to oust the current trough feeders of the ANC and its leader. Quite a few of the ANC have openly stated that they want the president GONE. Right now, it’s open season with much muck-raking and mud-slinging by those who are fearful of losing their positions of power towards those who are morally stronger than they. Corruption is endemic, billions are lost annually to dysfunctional parastatals, money which could have been used for housing, medical clinics, education. I keep on thinking and feeling and hoping this lawlessness cannot last, surely justice will be served and those who deserve to be put in jail will finally get their come-uppance. But who’s to know – maybe it’s too firmly entrenched already –

I know that we are all troubled by world events and sometimes everything seems hopeless given the floods & fires, people in exile fleeing their war-torn homes, innocent lives lost, droughts & threats of nuclear war. Things are too unstable – 

Faith & Doubt – strange bedfellows. Doubt can strengthen faith though most times I feel like a feather blown in the wind. But holding the tension of these opposites is the essential task I’ve come to realise, for me, even though it is very difficult. Maybe the transcendent will emerge from these two extremes and I, and we, will land and stand on terra firma …

Thank you for reading. Keep safe and keep the faith – may our centre hold. The equinox for both hemispheres is around the corner – may that moment of balance be of lasting value. And may the full moon shine her energetic and healing brightness to all corners of the earth –

Retreats & Reflections

It’s been a busy few weeks, with little time for reflection. Dr. Susan E. Schwartz, co-author of our book ‘Aging & Becoming ~ A Reflective Enquiry’ and her husband were here in South Africa for two weeks from the end of July. Susan presented a paper in Cape Town before flying up to Johannesburg which was our base for the next several days.

We took off for the Pilanesberg up in the northwest where we spent 3 nights and 4 days. Our accommodation was extremely comfortable, a mere few minutes away from the entrance to the Pilanesberg Game Reserve. Our drives were wonderful. There was game viewing a-plenty. I managed to video this rhino – 20 secs.

I love the reflection of the rhino in the crystal clear water –

We returned home on Friday afternoon and Susan & I gave a talk on our book the next afternoon at Bookdealers, a bookshop in Greenside, one of our suburbs. It was well attended & well received, many friends and others, books sold. Chris Reinders read an excerpt (the man in the hat), I’m next to him and Susan Schwartz next to me … my friend Linda took this photo and sent to me …

We left the next morning for Clarens, a lovely artsy town some few hundred kilometres away and close to the Golden Gate National Park. The view from the balcony where we were staying was magnificent overlooking the mountains – the first evening I photographed the full moon rising and later that night noticed a partial eclipse of it!

We spent precious time driving through the Golden Gate National Park – everything seemed golden – the light, the time, the mountains, animals at ease and ourselves at ease. Clarens is a very pretty town with all sorts of shops and cafe’s, lovely places for coffee and croissants – and shopping! Our two retreats into the wilderness were very valuable on many levels –

We were back home on Tuesday last week; my husband left early on Wednesday morning for several days to attend something that had long been in the works, returning only on Sunday evening. Susan, her husband & I – and another Susan, a dear friend – we were 3 Susan’s in my car – motored through to Pretoria on Wednesday for a lunch party held in honour of a visiting Swiss Analyst, an 85 year old man of such grace and wisdom, so present. It was such a special day, rich in conversations and people.

Thursday was busy, meeting with a few friends here and there who were keen to see Susan & Frederic. Thursday night dinner was with Vonn who first met them 18 years ago at the airport when we set off to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro …

Last Friday afternoon, Susan and I were interviewed off-air in the studios of Classic FM by the gracious Tamara LePine-Williams who hosts the morning radio show. She will let me know when it will be aired, and says that we will get a podcast of it. I’ll make a link to it, in a future blog post (if possible).

Susan gave a seminar to psychologists on ‘The Shadow’ on Saturday morning and they flew back to America on Saturday night –

In between all of this, there were lengthy phone calls and what’s app messages about my brother Christopher who lives in Natal and is in hospital following a partial shoulder replacement. The calls and what’s app messages were between my brother’s son who lives in Cape Town but who was with his father for several days, myself and my sister who is also in the Cape. He, and the situation he is in, is dire, beyond words … it is altogether troubling and anxious making for the 3 of us, the two sisters and his son. There is no-one else. And we all live elsewhere. He is currently in the ‘stepdown’ rehabilitation section of the hospital – his ongoing depression is much heightened –

And in among all this, the sun is shining, it is very cold, there is a slight wind. The weather turned overnight, from 24 degrees yesterday to 10 degrees today – we were warned. Parts of the country are blanketed in snow. The last few weeks have been sunny and warm, almost summer like after a spell of winter weather. Now, again, winter is here in full force or so it seems. -1 degrees tonight.

The photos below were taken today. In the first you can see a newly-popped poppy. I’ve been waiting for ages to see what was coming out of this planted tray – and will photograph them no doubt when the tray is is full bloom. On the orchid was a bee, always good to see –

The second is of pots on my patio – it’s a partly cloudy day and ideally I should have waited for full sunlight. There are many orchids still to bud – 

I sometimes feel suspended, between what and what I do not know. We’re all of us going through some sort of transition period, the events of the world are testament to that. Is the macrocosm a reflection of the microcosm I wonder. Each is a reality, and not independent of each other and each exerts its influence on the other …

More than ever, I feel the tension of those apparent opposites, within myself and without. More than ever, I feel the need to steer my ship in these rough seas, and hope to keep my balance as much as possible, to not retreat from anything, much as I would like to. I remind myself and remember the connection we have to each other and to our earth, and view that with as much loving kindness that I can.

I wish the same for you too …

Thank you for reading. May The Force be with you …

 We’re flying down this Sunday to Plettenberg Bay where we’ll be for a week. I’m having a few girlfriends this Saturday morning for breakfast. Although plans for the ‘menu’ are in place, I decided this morning to stew some fruit, something I’ve never done before. It tastes quite nice, both bitter and sweet. I thought I’d warm it slightly on Saturday when every one is here; they can add it to the full cream greek yoghurt I’ll put out. That will be the starter.

I peeled naartjies (clementines), removing as much of the pith that I could, cutting in half, ensuring no pips and adding to the hard pears that were already softening in the pot. I also added a little muscavado, a little balsamic, shake of cinnamon and ginger and some dried out prunes.

I thought how the times we are in, are times in which we are all metaphorically stewing.

There’ve been dreadful storms in Cape Town since Tuesday night, lives lost, a huge amount of damage, thousands displaced. Poor communities frightfully affected. The western Cape has been in severe drought for the last long while … water rationing is in full force. The storms and very high winds are expected to quieten down today. Cape Town has been battered and ravaged.

Then, as of yesterday, huge fires cut through Knysna. Knysna is 30 km away from Plettenberg Bay, approx 550 kms from Cape Town. Very high gale force winds caused immediate spreading to surrounding areas. Evacuations again of thousands were effected, brought to safe places like schools, yacht clubs and churches. Infernos cut their flaming swathes through the land. Elephants and horses needed to be evacuated. That fire raced to Plettenberg Bay’s surrounds where my son lives. It’s been a nightmare for all – many homes, farms, wild life and vegetation lost. Mike has been racing around just about all the time helping where he could. Arson in some cases is suspected. Earlier this morning he was washing his car because of all the dust, muck and grime and it started to rain – slightly –

Extreme and troubling times indeed. Labour vs Tory vote in the UK today. James Comey testifies before Congress in the US today. The political situation in South Africa is totally haywire and unbelievably corrupt. The DA (Democratic Alliance, main opposition party) Western Cape Premier, Helen Zille, has been suspended as of yesterday for a tweet she made in March and hung out to dry after the knives have been plunged into her. 

So much else world wide – hence my circle of light photo. Fire storms, rain storms, political storms, snow and ice; internal and external conflicts everywhere. I was going to blog from Plettenberg Bay next week but today I feel a sense of urgency. The photo helps me stand still in the centre of the storm and I hope it helps in some way for you too ..

May we bathe in the healing energies of the full moon tomorrow night – even as we know that the full moon can result in extreme weather and affect us in other ways –

 http://www.grahameb.com/pinkola_estes.htm – this is a link to Clarissa Pinkola Estes – her words on “We were made for these times”. With thanks to Deborah Gregory.

Pesach & Easter

a time for reflection – to deepen faith –

a time for redemption – to deepen faith –

a time for renewal – to deepen faith –

Pesach – Passover – commemorates the Exodus of the Jews from Egypt led by Moses out of 400 years of slavery into Israel, the land that God had promised on oath to Abraham. The Promised Land was finally reached, His promise fulfilled. 

A time to commemorate, in amongst many other issues, the freedom from bondage. I sent Susan Schwartz my friend and co-author in the US, Chag Sameach good wishes via email last night. She responded by saying inter alia this was a time to commemorate ‘freedom from bondage’. I’ve been thinking about that word ‘bondage’ – and all it can and does mean on both individual and collective levels. The meaning of the breaking of the matzoh bread – 

Easter – a remembrance of the carpenter from Nazareth and his wise teachings, told most times in parable form. A reflection on His resurrection 3 days after his burial. Did you know that when Christ was crucified there was then an earthquake? It’s a recorded fact. A remembrance of His love for the sinner who truly repents and the saint, reminding us that we too can put aside our hates and enmity even in these troubled times in which we live – and experience a renewal of our faith in love –

Faith – blessed are those of strong faith and those who feel their faith wavering. We here in South Africa have mostly totally lost faith in the president. We are going through a very difficult time and we forsee it for a long while yet. Last Friday, thousands upon thousands of us across the country took to the streets. Across races, religions, ages – peacefully, vibrantly, noisily, in unity. The one I attended was wonderful and it was so great to be part of this. There were no political affiliations represented – it was mostly a call for the president to resign and for our country to regain unity. I carried a home made banner (helped by my husband) showing the flag with ‘unity’ written across it and on the back I pasted red hearts. 

There is another major one tomorrow when people will march to the Union Buildings in Pretoria, for the president to resign.

Many of us here in South Africa, if not the majority, are feeling the strain of our faith being tested. I have a real and painful awareness of what is happening in other parts of the world, and I despair – and Doubt, a strange bedfellow to Faith. Please G.d may it be strengthening –

I did not want to let Pesach and Easter go by without acknowledging it. All good wishes to you all. Thank you for reading.

Departures, Death, Birthdays & Anniversaries

I took my husband, elder son Mike and his girlfriend Amanda to the airport this morning. My husband is off to Plettenberg Bay on his own, my son & girlfriend Amanda are off to Japan and The Philippines. My younger son Dave is also away, in Vietnam, with his lovely wife, Jüte. It’s their wedding anniversary today … one year since they were married on 19th March. And it’s Jüte’s birthday too. Dave tells of how he said to her that he would marry her only when she turned 25 – and that was the actual day they got married… today she’s 26 …

I got home from the airport, buying the Sunday Times en route, planning to do some things after I had chilled at home for a bit. I wanted to check on Harry our cat, who is an old chap already but he is I think, due to exit this world. He’s not eating, drinking a little water every now and then. I dreamed of him some nights ago, clambering up to a great height, then falling. I was in the bath, open to the elements and watched him falling. He landed on the side of the bath, his paws got a bit wet and then he slunk away. I was watching him in the garden this afternoon, sitting still, shifting position to face another way, then again and then again – I thought of the Buddha facing east, west, north and south as he bore witness to the earth and as he received enlightenment. I hope that Harry delays dying until my husband is back. He seems at peace. Right now, he’s sitting in my study on the mat with the glass door open.

I planned also this morning to phone my ill friend’s son Richard and ask if I could come round and sit with her for a bit. My cell phone beeped as I got out the car on my return home – it was a message from a mutual friend to say that Lyndy died peacefully this morning. Richard was at her side …

I messaged that person back immediately to ask if I could come round – come, he messaged back. There are other people here …

I left home soon after to go to Lynda’s home. I spoke to Richard who said that he was with her when she died, which was around 9.00 this morning. She was at peace he said – she died peacefully – I asked if I could go to her room and say goodbye – but no, he said.

There were many people. I had a few meaningful interchanges with family. Her elderly uncle, so dear – a cousin who I saw fairly often when I visited; another cousin who flew in last evening from abroad and saw her last evening.

So, the cycles of life, all in one day, the 19th of March – a prime number. Life, death, so closely intertwined. Life to be celebrated, anniversaries and birthdays too – and a death to be mourned – a departure –

And while I stick to my own advice of always keeping death alive on one’s left shoulder, my experience of her death leaves a hole in my heart ..

Rest in Peace dear Lyndy –  my friend from schooldays – sadly, fondly, lovingly remembered –