Equinox

It that’s time of the year again – a tilt and a turning –

The earth laughs in flowers: Ralph Waldo Emerson

I was away for 10 days in Cape Town and surrounds. I returned last Saturday evening and was thrilled to see my garden in full bloom. A hanging orchid was showing off –

The yesterday today & tomorrow against one of the sitting room windows and its delicious scent –

The bougainvillea showing signs of recovery and returning to colour

The redness of the bottle brush tree against the greenness –

I took some lovely photos while in Cape Town & surrounds. I didn’t get to see the whales. One day I set off on my own for Hermanus expressly for that purpose. My directions were off and I turned around after travelling for about an hour. My directions were off the previous day too when I went to see a friend in one of the Cape Town suburbs. Was so late. I’ve been there many times – I got lost again when returning to my sister’s home. 

I being me of course wondered about this – my going off in the wrong direction or not following directions or not being attentive enough. Where, why was I off-centre were some of the questions I asked myself. A few days previously I’d gone for a walk in my sister’s very pretty suburb. Lots of roads and streets, avenues and cul-de-sacs and very pretty verges –

Pin cushions – had it been a sunny late afternoon they would have glowed even more – I got a bit lost on my way back –

I took off on another walk another day and found myself at the dam which was a lovely surprise –

I was always very grateful that I returned safely from unfamiliar territory. And, I enjoyed my wanderings as I stepped out of my comfort zone –

My sister Debora and I try each time I visit her in Cape Town, to take a drive to Gordon’s Bay (a good 3/4 hour away), where we used to live as teenagers. Bikini Beach was literally over the road from our old home. Photo is of me standing on the road close to the house with the harbour off to the right. We’ve always walked the jetty to the end. I’d picked up earlier a couple of small yellow daises in a crack in the paving and put them in my pocket. Debora and I always have a chat with our parents for it is into the sea at the end of the jetty that we tossed their ashes so many years ago. We had a good chat with them … and then tossed the daisies into the sea and rocks below –

Another time my sister and I drove out to Muizenberg to pick up Lisa en route to Simonstown to see some friends. While she was attending to curtain people in her house, my sister and I went for a walk on the beach very close by.Debora –

I’ve been thinking about my sweet sister over these days – her kindness, her calm, her ability to be focused and deal with the task at hand. Her nurturing of her lovely garden, hit and destroyed by last year’s drought, now fairly newly planted and growing with indigenous plants, paving, rocks and cactus. 4 rain tanks and her ongoing commitment to conserving and saving water. The lovely dinners she made – like our mother, cooking with love and creativity. She uses recipe books for healthy and delicious eating. Her commitment to gym and exercise. Her ability to be focused when doing a 1500 piece puzzle. Her loving care for her husband and for her 2 poodles. Her wise words about not always seeing the negative but focusing on the positive.

Country-wise, in South Africa that is, it’s pretty painful to witness the commissions of enquiry into state capture. The rot is deep and profound, the impact huge. Media is letting us know – we have already known for quite a long time, but now the festering wounds are being opened even more. This has to happen – the wounds are being laid bare, open and gaping, gruesome in the extreme. A huge percentage of our population because of inter alia illiteracy is entirely unaware, though the word is getting out even to those in more remote areas. There is a ground swell of awareness I like to think, of just how badly they’ve been served by their elected officials. 

Many of us have good reason to believe that the Ramaphoria euphoria (Mr. Cyril Ramaphosa our president) is over – we had hoped for much more from his new presidency, eg getting rid of some his henchmen in the inner circle. I only hope he’s playing a long game – elections are next year. He’s going to have to wave his magic wand – as of yesterday he launched a daring proposal to stimulate the economy and promises much needed fixing where it’s needed. It’s on the table and his delegates will be held accountable. There is so much that is up the creek here in South Africa – yet so much potential – he’ll have to do more than wave his magic wand – somehow we’ll all have to pull together. And return to our sense of hope or possibilities from several months ago.

I sometimes feel adrift with all these transitions. On a personal note Neil, my husband, turns the key in the door in his private practice at the end of next month and officially retires as a medical specialist. His patients are devastated. Some have spoken about flying down to Plettenberg Bay to see him. Who knows, maybe he’ll have a small practice down there. He and I have no idea of how this transition is going to be. We’ll maintain our home here in Johannesburg for a while. Both sons come up from the Cape fairly regularly for reasons of work and use our home as a base. I need to be in Johannesburg next year for various reasons. I imagine there’ll be some to-ing and fro-ing, maybe exploring places en-route, something I’ve always wanted to do. Road trip through our beautiful country. Organising things this end and that end –

In spring time, some homes show their beautiful gardens to the public. We went last Sunday to Neil’s old home where his parents and he lived. The gardens and home were very lovely. It was a trip down memory lane for him. ‘Strathy’ was its name – I remember his lovely home and his parents.  I took many photos but here’s one –

To end – as I write I am full of a virus. We should be leaving tomorrow, Sunday, for Southbroom, on the Natal south coast. We’re postponing for a day or so until I am over this. My husband phoned Rory this morning (our host for several days) to say about a delay by a day or two. He asked him at my request if there were any whales, to which Rory said that as they were talking he could see a whale breeching about 200 mtrs away. So this has lifted me somewhat … or considerably I should say –

The Equinox – when the centre of the sun is directly above the equator and when both north and south hemispheres are equally illuminated.

When we were travelling in June we went to see the Black Madonna in Einseideln, outside Zurich.. We were both overwhelmed at the beauty of her and felt her illumination. As I look at my photos of her on my phone I am again struck by her illuminating light and it is this that I pass on to you on the Equinox. 

The earth will be still for one brief moment tomorrow. May we all feel that stillness – as the wheel of the sun moon and stars and our planet continues turning – and we tilt this way and that –

Thank you for reading!

Today, Yesterday, Tomorrow –

This is a photo I took 2 years ago on safari in Ngaka Modiru Molema, Botswana. I was hunting through my photos on my phone to see if I had one of wildebeest crossing a river; I‘m pretty sure I do but I reckon it’s in the cloud somewhere.

 I was watching a person on TV speaking in parliament today while having coffee. I missed the beginning so I can’t give his name. He was saying about the absolute necessity of South Africa to use farm land for crops and agriculture. This includes the expropriation of land without compensation. We are able to provide for all, including export he said, if commercial farming (and for personal gain) is properly implemented:a plan for training, machinery, and good living farm conditions with schools and clinics. Title deeds (not leases) to be given for such land, which can be used as collateral for loans from banks – farmers, black and white, men and women, are very eager to farm and be prosperous.

He ended his rather impassioned plea saying he wanted to leave them with an image. He spoke of the wildebeest and their migration.

Imagine huge herds of wildebeest on one side of the river, he said. It is dry, there is no food. They need to get to the other side where the grass is greener and their calves can be born. If they stay on the one side, the lions will eat them. They have to cross the river, even if there are crocodiles in the current. But they can’t just jump into the river one by one – they’ll be attacked by the crocs. The banks on the other side of the river are high; they’ll have to clamber up those steep slopes.

So, there are risks. I saw this as an apt metaphor for today and tomorrow. A raging current to be traversed – 

Last evening I was at my usual Monday night Jung reading group. Sometimes a passage we read is so relevant to the current situation here in South Africa as well as world wide that not much actual study gets done. Last night was just such an evening – we each expressed our grave concerns about this beautiful country we live in. I’m starting to feel like a stranger in my own land. I’ve been feeling uneasy for a long while. We discussed whether it is better for our psychological health to remain hopeful that things will work themselves out and NOT to listen or watch the news.. I’m trying to figure out exactly what my feelings are. I do know that I’m witnessing the dark side of human nature as never before – though as someone said we know of it already as in WW1 & WW2 and the Holocaust and other historical and current atrocities. Yes, this is true. As in the migration of people from Venezuela because of the collapse of the economy. As in people trying to get to Europe as refugees or asylum seekers and the many deaths due to overloaded boats and/or people smuggling. As in suicide bombers. As in elephant and rhino poaching, as in drought, flooding, pollution … do I really want to know all this? I don’t actually – I really don’t. It gets to me on a gut level. We agreed that these sorts of feelings also render us somewhat powerless, if not unhinged. With what’s going on in SA, it feels as if the whole of SA is depressed. The rot is deep. Thousands are emigrating, skilled professionals. I feel anarchic at times.

Today while driving I heard on the news that SA is technically in a recession. Our currency is fast depreciating. The cost of living is already high and the poor are feeling it most. But we’re all feeling the pinch. Less money to spend which affects the economy. Money is now used for basics – not for spending –

What does this all mean we wondered last night? What is the meaning of meaning? But, as always, it is imperative to hold our centre in the midst of it all. The wheel keeps turning. It’s always intensely dark before sunrise –

I’m flying down to Cape Town tomorrow morning for several days. I want to see the sea and mountains and some friends. I especially want to see the whales. To see those great leviathans emerge from the depths that let us know they are there in all their magnificence. My friend Jan who is in our Monday night meetings sent me this little video this morning, of whales in Hermanus, this morning, this day. I’ll be visiting Hermanus, about an hour and a half outside of Cape Town.

Thank you for reading. L’Shana Tovah and well over the fast, Happy Labour Day, and may you all be well.

I’ve removed the whales video – it was causing some problems … Tues 18th Sept

International Nelson Mandela Day

We arrived home 2 weeks ago after being away in Europe for just over 3 weeks. Home – the reality was as joyful as the anticipation. All was well on our return thanks to Jane (Kgomotso, her African name) our housekeeper; Angie our ginger cat was happy to have us back home to lord it over us.. The winter garden looked healthy, bright and green though I was warned beforehand that the cold bite was due the next day. And boy did it bite. From the northern summer climes to hard hitting bitter biting cold. Snow all over South Africa. The temperatures plunged overnight … and it is still cold cold cold. Up here on the highveld (Johannesburg, 2000 mts above sea level) the cold is different – the skies are bright blue, so it is deceptive.

Our European trip was eventful and wonderful. There are a few photographs at the end of this post.

As eventful on our return was the rescue of the Thai schoolboys in the cave and the death of the courageous Thai Navy Seal diver Saman Kunan. And learning that their coach, Ekapol Chanthawong, taught them to meditate to stay calm in the cave, made my blood corpuscles expand in a good way. The Wimbledon semi finals kept us on the edge of our seats, Kevin Anderson (SA) playing against John Isner (US). The 5th & final set was Anderson’s, 26:24, the longest in Wimbledon history. Anderson lost to Djokovic in the finals. The soccer World Cup was also pretty exciting, some of it we watched while in Europe. The political dramas around the world are worrying, here in South Africa also. Every day our heads spin at the latest uncovering of graft and corruption of those in power. Riots, strikes, violent protests are the order of the day –

Today is Nelson Mandela International Day, a day set up by ‘The Elders’ 16 years ago to honour this man and all for which he stood. Today is the day of his birth, 100 years ago. Yesterday afternoon I watched the live TV broadcast at the Wanderers Stadium, just a short way from where I live in Johannesburg. Persons in the past who’ve been invited to give the annual lecture include Mary Robinson (former prime minister of Ireland);  Kofi Annan former general secretary of the UN; Ellen Sirleaf former president of Liberia; Kgalema Motlanthe former president and deputy president of South Africa and many other dignitaries over the years.

Yesterday’s invited guest was US former president Barack Obama. There were several speeches beforehand, the first given by Prof. Njabulo Ndebele, academic and chairman of the Nelson Mandela Foundation. My heart swelled at listening to him. One of his anecdotes was of Richard Stengel, American editor, journalist and author who collaborated with Mandela’s book ‘Long Walk to Freedom’. Stengel and Mandela were in an airplane over Natal when Stengel saw that the prop of the plane had stopped turning. He told Mandela who merely nodded his head – You’d better tell the pilot, he said. Which Stengel did. The pilot was aware and said he’d alerted ground forces in the event of a crash landing. Stengel relayed this back to Mandela who merely nodded his head and said yes. They landed safely. Afterwards Mandela expressed his real fear of this incident but he also spoke of his fear for humanity. Stengel relayed how calm and calming Mandela was in his ability to suppress his inner fears so as to be brave for other people. 

Mr. Mandela has also said that if the poor and marginalised do not have a future, then those who are privileged also do not have a future –

Patrick Motsepe founder of the Motsepe foundation followed Prof. Ndebele’s speech, then Graça Machel widow of Mr. Mandela. She made her husband come alive for us when she spoke of him. Her essential message was to recognise our common humanity. Mr. Cyril Ramaphosa our president then stepped up to the microphone to rapturous applause. It was lovely to see him beaming and looking much less stressed and exhausted than he usually does. He spoke inter alia of the need to clean up and fix our broken institutions. And the need for accountability and responsibility of each and every person.

Mr Barack Obama followed also to rapturous applause. He gave a rousing speech, highlighting many advances in all fields made since 100 years ago and the strides in the last few decades. He spoke of the current danger of going back to the old ways, of authoritarianism, nationalism, restriction of freedom of speech. The more things change the more they stay the same. He reminded us of the value of activism at the grass roots level.

I’ve excerpted a few of Obama’s statements thanks to the FB feed of Don Maxwell Searll.

A few days in Paris, this one overlooking the Seine, close to Notre Dame Cathedral, before flying to Lisbon to catch a taxi to Sintra –

The villa in Sintra

view from balcony of villa, castles everywhere on the mountainside –

Down the lane from the villa we were staying in, in Sintra, I was admiring the lemons in the garden. This lovely lady picked some for me. They were huge!

family photograph of my sister-in-law Jenny, her husband Mike, Neil, their son Alex and his twin daughters

After our wonderful family holiday in Portugal, we flew to Zurich. There were so many highlights, the ride on the tram to Einsiedeln and seeing the Black Madonna on 21st June which was the solstice or close enough to it. She was magnificent – words cannot describe the emotions that were evoked in both Neil and myself.We went on a boat to Küsnacht and visited the Jung Institute there. I bought this book …

and walked down the road to see Jung’s house…

Our hotel in Zurich was central to much … the restaurant over the road called Tibits was one we frequented often, 100% vegetarian.

From Basel after 4 nights in Zurich, we embarked on the boat for the river cruise up the Rhine. So many photos of beauty, hard to select one … this from the deck in Canal d’Alsace

There were many excursions to places of historical interest when the boat docked. We could either join planned excursions or walk about towns at our own leisure. We did both … I’ll write about some of those places another time –

7 nights later after cruising through countryside of great beauty we docked in Amsterdam where we spent two nights on the boat.  We did a cruise seeing Amsterdam from the river. We also did a lot of walking. The one below is standing outside Anne Frank’s house –

Thank you for reading. May this find you well and may your centre hold.

Travel and transitions

It’s the first time I’m using my iPad to put up a post. Not without difficulty – but I felt that I didn’t want to let the 20th June go by without acknowledging transitions.

We’ve spent a week in Sintra Portugal with my husband’s family from the States – his sister and her husband, their son and wife and delightful 9 year old twins, and their daughter. A very comfortable villa, gorgeous garden and pool, and views of the mountains and castles. I wish I could post pictures but getting them from my cell to iPad is beyond me.

I’m not sure of the exact date of the solstice, whether it’s the 20th, 21st, 22nd, 23rd but the solstice it is, longest day here in the northern hemisphere, longest night back home in the southern hemisphere – and then a tilting of the earth’s axis – and a seasonal transition.

It’s also 5 years to the day of my car accident, the day before moving from our old home to our new one, the townhouse. I remember my younger son praying over me at the side of my upturned car, and my right hand dangling next to me. The ambulance ride I don’t remember, I remember vaguely being wheeled in for the operation, both sons and my husband there.

We did move the next day, on the solstice which was  also a full moon that night, and which was my plan 5 years ago. I remember learning patience – my right hand was badly damaged and encased in plaster for several weeks … using my left hand to write blog posts and do the usual that had to be done.

We leave Sintra today and fly to Zurich for a few days before embarking on a boat cruise.

It’s been a big year this year. Politically in South Africa where we had a change of president and we’re still battling to emerge from all that was so badly wrong. I know this is true around the world.

My husband and I both turned 70 – he at the end of May and I about 2 weeks ago. (Adding later: NOT 2 weeks ago, it was last week!!!) So this too is a transition. I’m just acknowledging a still point and transitions and I hope that any transitions you are or may be making go well and creatively.

-thank you for reading-

In Limbo

The president of South Africa, mr. jacob zuma, was due to give his State of the Nation Address (SONA) tomorrow night in the Houses of Parliament in Cape Town. But, for a few weeks already, there’ve been protests about this as he is seen as not fit to address Parliament and the nation. He has about 780 criminal charges against him and he has not yet seen his day in court. He is wily. And has friends in high places. For the last few years, there have been fisticuffs and blood on the floor during jacob zuma’s annual SONA and only when the EFF (Economic Freedom Front) has been thrown out for protesting and other opposition parties have walked out in disgust at behaviour unbecoming, has some sort of order been restored and he was able to proceed in his egoistic waffle.

He is NOT fit to address the nation. It seems that many in his inner circle also feel this way. Yesterday, it was announced that the SONA has been postponed. And, it was noted yesterday, there would an urgent meeting of the NEC (National Executive Committee) today to decide the way forward, given the postponement of SONA.  We took this to mean that zuma would be urged to step down and measures would be taken to ensure a smooth transition. Today, it was announced that the NEC had decided it was NOT going to meet and that the deputy president, Mr. Cyril Ramaphosa (also ANC president) and zuma were in meetings today in ‘constructive talks’.

 We do not know what is going on. We do NOT want zuma to go the way of Mugabe (ex pres of Zimbabwe) who has retained much of his ill gotten wealth and creature comforts. Plus pension etc etc etc – Zuma must face his charges or face impeachment – which is also on the cards. He has NOT upheld our constitution. He must NOT get amnesty. He must NOT avoid prosecution. He has brought our country to the brink. Zillions of Rands (our currency) has left the country illegally, lining the purses of criminals.

So we wait, for the next stage of the unfolding ongoing drama. Hence feeling in limbo. A vacuum –

I can’t help but reflect that what is happening in our country is happening just about everywhere else. We have to keep standing up against the rotten apples, the snakes in the grass who believe that because they hold high office, are above the law.

The protests of the ordinary people is what is needed, at all times. It is thanks to them as well as our judiciary system and the constitution, that many in high office are falling like dominoes and being held accountable for their crimes. It is refreshing to see –

There is never a dull moment in our country. I feel hopeful, and inspired that right is might and will ultimately be victorious. The day zuma leaves office is the day I believe the rain will fall where it is needed, bringing relief to the drought not only to the land but also to where we’ve felt the drought in our hearts, minds and souls.  

Thank you for reading. Do you feel hopeful, in spite of all to the contrary, that right will ultimately prevail?

Precipitation

This is not precipitation of the ‘rain’ kind – it is of a different kind –

It’s been a day of being at home after being away for several days and settling in and attending to my study. I was scratching in a desk drawer for something and pulled out a scrap of paper, undated ..

It was/is a precipitation in my writing – on the back of a torn envelope –

Prayers:

for Christopher to know that he can return to who he essentially is, a good and caring doctor. And if not in the way he was before, then in some other way.

I pray that he regains his self-regard.

I pray that he does not hide behind depression.

I pray that he pays real soulful attention to himself.

                                                                                             x x x x x x x x x x x x

Many many years ago, at a guess I would say 20 years, my good friend who knows Christopher said about precipitation and that she had used it effectively on occasion, for her father if I remember correctly who was unwell. It was the first I’d heard of it. She is a science prof, so not in any way ‘woo woo’.  She did one for Christopher at that time. I’ve done a few over the years. And now I find myself taking this up again.

This one appears to be the only one I’ve retained. I’m paying attention to the timing of finding this old one with regard to other friends, not necessarily those with depression or with Christopher’s particular afflictions. I bought a pretty note book at a fair in the suburbs of Cape Town earlier this month and I’m using a separate page for each of those I know who are in some sort of crisis, soul and/or body wise. My sister for her ankle that is taking a long time healing and is painful. My neighbour who had a hip operation last week; my friend from Cape Town who had surgery recently here in Johannesburg to remove a basal carcinoma very close/behind her eye; another friend in Cape Town who is recovering from a hip operation; a friend here in Johannesburg whose husband committed suicide 2 years ago – the anniversary is this Sunday; another local, dear friend who is in the depths of despair and feels her soul is no longer alive. There are a few more – I’m writing out precipitations for them each. I saw on a google search that it is a form of intercession. Or prayer if you will … on behalf of another –

There’s something about putting my ‘precipitations’ down on paper and reading them daily or nightly or whenever as a prayer – into the atmosphere –

I am home, back from my Somerset West school re-union held near Stellenbosch/Somerset West (outside of Cape Town) in a lovely restaurant earlier this month. I had my hair cut and bleached while there – the day after I arrived – in parts (strand by strand) to begin the process of going au naturel – going grey naturally (hopefully gracefully). If this first step is anything to go by, I like it a lot. It’s an excellent cut and I like the grey/silver with the brown. Others who’ve seen it like it too. A few with fulsome praises – I enjoy an ego stroke every now and then, even if transient!

My Cape Town visit was very special on many levels. I saw 4 precious friends, 3 of whom schlepped a fair distance to come and visit me in the suburbs at my sister’s home for which I was and am very grateful. The school re-union was lovely – people I have not seen for 50 years! People came from far and wide, Australia, Canada, UK, Namibia and locally of course. Being with my sister was very special. She faithfully and arduously conserves water because of the severe drought and water shortage in Cape Town. All water is recycled. I got a shower down to 2 mins max. Water from the shower into the loo .. not a drop is wasted. Dishwashing water, much else. My sister’s daughter’s small sons are a delight. I feel privileged to be great aunt to them. Last Tuesday night my younger son and his wife came for dinner, as did my niece and her sons, my sister’s son and my brother’s son – 

We visited ZeitzMOCAA (Museum of Contemporary Art Africa) last week the day before I flew home.  It is an extraordinary structure at the Cape Town Waterfront (the link https://zeitzmocaa.museum/  will show a few pictures under ‘Exhibition’). It’s hailed as The Tate of Africa. It is a refurbishment of silos and turbines and is now a magnificent architectural delight with 6 stories of enormous rooms containing art from all parts of Africa. It was officially opened in October. My sister and I met Robert there last Wednesday. He’s a classmate of mine from 50 years ago. He lives in Sydney where he is a forensic psychiatrist. Here we’re having an iced coffee after roaming the museum.

This is my photo of a bronze entitled ‘Zeus’ in the museum –

It’s raining as I write late-ish this Tuesday night – crashing thunder and lightning about. I hope it’s going to be a jolly good downpour. The distinct smell of rain in the air is called ‘petrichor’ and/or it’s the earthy smell after rains have soaked the dry earth. It’s hot here up on the high veld in Johannesburg. May rains come wherever they are needed.  I’ve added that to my precipitation list especially for where the drought is dire –

Thank you for reading. May this find you well. I pray for peace in this troubled world of ours and pray also that we each somehow manage to manoeuvre these trying times. May The Force be with you all.