W : WHEEL & WEIGHT

wheel images

Everything goes, everything comes back; eternally rolls the wheel of being.

Friedrich Nietzsche

I think of Sisyphus with his shoulder to the boulder pushing it to the top of the mountain – it would roll down and the task would be repeated, for eternity. No variation – just up and down, endless repetition. Such is the weight and wheel of life when one refuses to lift the needle from its stuck-ness on the record track and our lives are rendered devoid of meaning.

This time of aging makes it even more imperative to see where it is that we are endlessly repeating the same old wounds. The weight of those wounds want and need to be worked out and the load lightened. It may bring wisdom in its wake, even if only because they have been given attention as a way of not repeating a tired way of reacting.

Time spent in quietness, reflection and silence is not wasted time. It is time well spent, wondering about this thing called life and all it’s joys and catastrophes. What was – and what can yet be. To find the poetry in one’s soul that wants to emerge. To find what is deeply felt and meaningful to ourselves has enormous value even if we lose familiar parts of ourselves along the way. It is time to connect to one’s soul and heart and listen to its faint callings.

We find ourselves facing the winter of our lives and wonder again if there is water to feed our souls. Winter invariably seems dark and dank, dry and dead. Stark and grim is what we see above ground. Things lie underground, invisible for a long time. The waiting is long for anything to emerge, and we are impatient for the seed to emerge. But wait we must –

Many of us feel that we have no real worth – for whatever reason. Maybe this is the time to not only ‘wonder’ about this, but also to embark on ‘wandering’ around one’s self, as a healing circumambulatio, an alchemical term denoting a circling around, a movement to the essence through the indirect, the ambiguous. Walk on the edge and slowly circle in. This may be a painful exercise and only further confuse and confound and could seem as if the wheel is going in reverse.

Time to get behind the steering wheel and put your own gas into it and drive it the way you want, instead of being asleep at the wheel. Is it comfortable behind the wheel? Is it getting you somewhere? Is it more like a roulette wheel? Can we re-invent the wheel?

We talk about losing weight – is there a more constructive way of looking at this and rather wonder about ‘gaining lightness’? Don’t watch the weight being lost; watch the light growing..

Can you let go of some of the weight of the wheel accrued?

28 Comments on W – Wheel & Weight

  1. I loved this post. We can stay on that circular path to nowhere and allow it to steamroll our lives, or we can find a way to rise above, take the wheel and direct it toward something better. It’s all about choices. I’m really enjoying your A-Z posts, very thought provoking.

    • Thanks Melissa for commenting. The circular path may be the more valuable one as opposed to the one that goes up and down. Life is usually circuitous. Best to be behind the wheel, awake, while making conscious choices.

  2. Thanks for stopping y Lynda … guilt is useful only when it prompts you to act. Thinking is hard work, reading is usually for pleasure. Sounds as if you have the perfect balance on this public holiday.

  4. Susan, I once wrote a short story about Sisyphus where the point was really to roll down the hill with the rock, like sledding. You work to get up the hill for the joy of flying down the hill. I was trying to suggest we misread that rock story!!

    • Thank you Beth, that’s an interesting viewpoint! Even if there is great pleasure in sledding down when up at the top, to repeat this endlessly would tire me out. Would be interested in reading your short story!

  5. I’m not sure if I interpreted this post the right way, but I felt much of it was about breaking destructive cycles. To that end, I’ve decided to finally seek help for my claustrophobia. It’s not something I suffer frequently, but I never know when it will strike, which heightens its power. And it always seems to happen at the most inconvenient times: in a tent in the pouring rain, in an airline seat, while trying to sleep in a camper. I’m hoping someone in my city will be able to help me overcome this.

    • Thank you Holli for commenting. Breaking destructive cycles is necessary on our journey and it is wise that you are seeking help for this. May this go well – does that feeling of being ‘closed in’ – psychologically – have something to do with this?

  6. I like this post, it’s beautifully written. I’ve lately been trying to not be impatiently awaiting what is coming next (for example grumpily waiting all week just for the weekend to arrive.) I’d love to break that cyclical negativity and be better at enjoying and thinking more on what’s happening now, today. Your post reminded me of that goal, which for me at least is easier said than done!

    Nancy at Hungry Enough To Eat Six
    2014 A to Z Challenge Participant

    • Nancy thank you for your comments. I’ll check your posts when back home. There’s no wi fi on the mountains where I am – cell phone seems to work but all is very limited.

  7. Time in quiet and reflection is important and sometimes scary. The things that rattle around in the quiet…like that great boulder Sisyphus must spend eternity with. I liked your post. Some very good thoughts in there. 🙂

    • Thank you Anna for your comments. I like what you say ‘…things that rattle around in the quiet. .’ – quite graphic.
      When home later I’ll check your posts. No wi fi where I am in the mountains so have been reduced to cellphone use.

  8. Much as I enjoy traveling this path of enlightenment on aging and becoming with you two Susans, I got way behind, from N through S, and have now commented. I could say that the stone rolled over me and flattened me temporarily, but that is not the case — just obligations and computer glitches.

  9. Ah, the baggage. The subject of this post is where I am now, and I like the thought of focusing on “gaining lightness.” I think I’ll make this my mantra for now. I am impatient for the seeds to grow, but getting better at having patience in recent years. The pattern of lifetimes, the universal pattern, IS that of a natural ebb and flow. And since we’re now in Taurus (the sun’s position), this subject is apt, for Taurus is patience: “When you’re patient, you’re right; when you’re not, you’re wrong.” Could we say “the lightness of waiting”?

  10. I’m going to try to let go of the weight accumulated this weekend. At least a little bit. Time spent in quietness — oh, I want that so badly. Silence, nothing moving, no one talking, just me and my thoughts. 🙂

  12. This is a lovely post. Winter also brings solitude and time for reflection… peace. I do wonder if I have “let go of the wheel” of life, but am I brave enough and strong enough to pick it up again. Do I want to charge back on to the highway filled with traffic and accidents?

    I am so enjoying your posts. Thank you.

  14. I read somewhere that that time you think you’re wasting is not wasted at all. Look at it differently. I like that about as much as I like this post, Susan. Thanks, it’s great!

  17. Lovely post, it’s like being able to let go of some of the stones and boulders of life that we pick up on our journey and which weigh us down if we are not careful enough.

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