Aging & Becoming


Life shrinks or expands according to one’s courage: Anais Nin.

The 2 Susans, one in Phoenix Az., and I in Johannesburg, South Africa, are preparing our posts for the April A-Z blog challenge 2014. We’re hoping to be able to schedule them so that come the day, come the hour, we can just press a button and voila! UP they appear!

In the April A-Z blog challenge we’ll be posting on topics on the theme: ‘Aging & Becoming’. 

We’ve done several so far over the airwaves, all still to be edited and fashioned according to the A-Z script – (not too long for one thing). And still more letters of the alphabet to do. I’ll be with Susan in Phoenix towards the end of March. I can only imagine two non-techie non savvy individuals trying to get this all sorted … press a button and UP they go? Pictures, quotes and body of post?

We’re enjoying doing them though it has been tough putting into 500 words or so what we want to say for that particular letter. We do not know whether this is a topic that will garner interest on the April A-Z blog challenge. Naturally, we hope that our psychological posts are of interest irrespective of age and across all ‘fields’. Naturally, we hope that our blog posts receive attention and comments – whether in agreement or not. (No attachment to outcome I keep telling myself …)

For the last several months Susan and I have been working on a collaborative effort i.e. a book on ‘Aging & Becoming’. It is very psychological – from the psyche – the only way.

We’ll be posting blogs on topics covered in our book.

In our book we combine our diverse experiences of life and share our perspectives and cogitations. We note how ‘aging’ is applicable to us and we wonder how this process is shaping our lives. We’re both in a different place emotionally than several years ago. We wonder about yet ‘becoming’ as we step into this particular stage of our lives – one with its own challenges, peaks and valleys. Still able, and yet feeling tremendous shifts.

We comment in our book – and will do so in the A-Z blog posts as well – about, inter alia, the conscious and unconscious restraint against the older woman in Western oriented cultures. Because we feel the restrictions around ‘age’ we decided to write about it. We felt that something needed to be said.

We continue to work on our book ‘Aging & Becoming’ on a shared document over the continents. Sometimes we lose several pages of the document which is very upsetting. Somehow we find them again. It’s a bit like aging – lost and found. Losing and finding – and not just documents.

I’ve been popping into the A-Z blog challenge list and making brief comments here and there. The list will no doubt grow as 1st April looms ..

Your comments are always welcome. And so is sharing on various social media – thank you.

Please subscribe in the box made available if you wish to receive posts leading up to the 1st April and the actual challenge itself.

59 Comments on Aging & Becoming

  1. I don’t know if it’s just me or if everybody else experiencing issues with your blog.
    It appears as if some of the written text within your posts are running off the screen. Can someone else please comment and let me know if this is happening to them too?
    This could be a issue with my web browser because I’ve had this happen before.
    Appreciate it

  2. Looks like you will be having a interesting A to Z Challenge – Shall look forward to visiting again in April.

  3. Thank you so much Liz! I so appreciate your stopping by. You’re right it is a ‘great fortune’ as you say and it is time to wonder about the next ‘stage of life’. May the next however many years be ones of good health, joy and continuing creativity.

  4. I’m extremely interested in your topic, I turned 50 about 6 months ago. Up until this last birthday I have enjoyed getting older, age has made me feel so much freer. However, now that I have the great fortune to have lived half a century I’m more aware of age, and how it influences my life. I’m looking forward to keeping up with all of your posts in April 🙂

  5. I feel as if I’m meeting an old friend Kern, thank you so much for coming by and warming my heart with your lovely comment, thank you so so much!

    Re: your involvement with the Alzheimer Society, please see Samantha Mozart’s comment earlier.

    Later on this a.m. when back I plan to check out your abandoned buildings post. I glimpsed it yesterday. Will more than glimpse later. So pleased to ‘see’ you Kern! I remember you well from last year. Always made me laugh and smile. A 1000 distractions every day with your lively posts! (am grinning as I type)

  6. *rubs hands together in glee* Susan, I can hardly wait to read both your blog posts and your upcoming book. April looks brighter every day. Last year, your A-Z posts were a real gift, and I couldn’t believe my luck when I first arrived at your blog. Your theme this year is very close to my own heart, not only because I’m approaching 60 rather faster than I’d ever assumed I would, but because I work at the Alzheimer Society and spend a lot of time with my colleagues pondering all manner of issues pertaining to aging. I love your title, Aging and Becoming–beautiful. – Kern

  7. What a lovely, mindful blog — and project! — you have here. Congratulations. I’m glad I didn’t give up on trying to find you. It was a merry chase, haha–which is actually another reason why I felt it was important. You commented on my A2Z post about lasting relationships this week, and we had a bit of a back-and-forth about creating a signature link for comments. Yep, in your case it’s really important, because the link on your name leads me somewhere else 🙂 Please contact me via my blog or email (guilie172 at gmail dot com) if you’d like me to help you figure this out — I’ll be happy to.

    Guilie @ A Hop Within A Hop: The A-Z Theme Reveal!

    • Guile, that is so kind thank you! We have just got back from being away in the bush for the weekend and picked up your comment only now. I MAY have found a way to resolve the issue of signature link (thank you so so much for continuing to ‘find’ me) but I will look into this later (I was unable to attempt to sort it ‘in the bush’ as there was no internet connection). Irrespective of sorting it or not, I plan to contact someone to give me some lessons this coming week of how to work ipad etc while away from later on in the month.

      Thank you again … I so appreciate this.

  8. Susan, Thank you so much for visiting my blog and leaving a comment. (about the ceiling lamp/fan redo)

    Aging and Becoming sounds interesting to me and right up my alley. I will be 60 on Sunday and I am doing a lot of soul searching, making amends and trying to “become” that woman I have always admired. The last decade was shrouded in death and grieving so my 50’s were a total wash. It’s a new decade for me. I plan on celebrating it all year long!

    I am looking forward to the A-Z challenge. My 2nd year. It was fun, but I was happy when it was over. Take Care – Debby

    • Thanks so much Debby for stopping by! For me it is also my 2nd year and I’m writing the posts already along with my friend Susan in Phoenix. I’m here in South Africa but will be visiting her and a few others next month in the US. When Susan and I get together we may be like the blind leading the blind in getting them up – we’re not techno savvy but somehow we’ll muddle through. HAppy Birthday for Sunday! Hope you have a wonderful day and year and may the last decade have strengthened you enormously. What a lot you’ve had to deal with… You too take care – Susan

  9. Greetings Susan,

    My kind friend, your theme intrigues. Ageing and Becoming. I had to spell “ageing” in English, English 🙂 Hate seeing the squiggly red line 🙂

    I am officially the “anti-A to Z spokesman”, as bestowed upon me by Arlee Bird. Even though I don’t like the way it hijacks the month of April, I wish you and all those involved, much positivity and interaction for all the ideals of a caring, sharing ethos.

    Thank you, Susan. And thank you for your very thoughtful comment on my blog. I appreciate that.

    In kindness,


    • Gary, thanks so much for stopping by! Here in South Africa, ‘ageing’ is mostly spelled with an ‘e’, but without the ‘e’ is also acceptable, whatever that means. The red line is difficult to live with so I go without ..(mmmm, that all sounds metaphorical…).

  10. Your theme on “Aging & Becoming” sounds like it will be a topic that A-to-Z Challenge participants will be more than happy to discuss and share their thoughts and perspectives on the subject. The challenge is all-inclusive, as we welcome topics that span the interests of all ages, fields of expertise and experiences. That’s what makes the A-to-Z Challenge so fun…not knowing what you’re going to be reading, for the most part. It’s exciting.

    Thanks for signing up to participate!

    2014 #atozchallenge Co-Host

  11. My Dear Friend,

    I look forward to reading your blog posts. Aging is definitely something that is frown upon in our society. I too am addressing it in my book that I am writing from a novelist point of view.

    All the best and have a safe trip to Phoenix. I find it to be a very interesting city.


    • Thank you Patricia for stopping by. You know how much I appreciate this.

      It’s extraordinary- aging is in the air it seems! I wish you so well with your book .. hope it’s going well!

  12. Susan, it will be a pleasure to read the post and subsequent book. Taken separately, aging and becoming sound as the negative and positive side of the same coin. Together, they give the passing of time its full value. Thank you for sharing this!

    • Thank you so much Marta! What an interesting observation about negative and positive poles, thank you for making this. I hadn’t thought of it in that way. Truly, I learn much from others’ comments!

  13. Dear Susan, your posts were fascinating in 2013 as I am sure they will be this year. Timely for me as I have just returned from a trip to my ageing and Alzheimers afflicted mother. I was thinking of covering the disease as my theme, I think I will stick to ex boyfriends now and revel in the wisdom you will no doubt provide. Best wishes

    • Ida, so great to hear from you thank you! What a big concern re your Mom. A friend of mine in the US writes about her journey with her aging and Alzheimer’s afflicted mother …her link is on my page on rhs if you care to take a peek. She writes so movingly about this… salmonsaladandmozart.
      I look forward to reading your A-Z – I remember last year’s well! It was so so good to meet you! Have a great weekend and thank you again.

    • Ida, re: my comment to you I posted a few hours back, I realised that if you hit on Samantha Mozart a few comments back, this will get you to her site –

        • So pleased Ida! She is not my writing partner – it is Susan in Phoenix who is. I hope that Samantha/Carol picks up on this!

          • Hello Ida. I’m picking up here. I changed the name of my blog; it was Salmon Salad and, but now is The Scheherazade The content is the same, though, just shifted the focus a bit since my mother died in April 2012. But, the earlier posts, which you can find in the Archives (left sidebar) or top menu bar under Journal, Vol. I & Vol. II tell the story of my mother’s and my journey through her dementia. I was her caregiver at home the whole time, a decade. I published two books, too, on our experience — you can click on them in the right sidebar and that will take you through to Amazon where you can “look inside.”

            I wish you the best with your mom. It is a sad and difficult journey.

            My pen name is Samantha Mozart — I didn’t want to use our real names when I was writing about my mother.

            Thank you, Susan.


  14. Looking forward to your A-Z, I won’t be doing it this year.

    BTW, I have now signed up for the THIRD time to get notifications when you have a blog out, they seem to work once or twice and then fffzt. Hope this one stays active as I always assume you’ve merely been busy with other stuff and then find, as now, you’ve been a busy blogger and nobody told me! Your project sounds incredibly exciting and I hope, 9 months down the line, you are restored to full health. You’ve certainly been keeping busy 🙂

      • am concerned you say about not being able to subscribe to my blogs? And sorry I am writing to you about this only now … have you tried again with any success .. I know you said you’ve tried already 3 times. IF (with the wedding coming up!) you can let me know this would be a very grateful SA gal. I will alert my son to this if (&*^% keeps on happening …
        All best,

  15. Greetings from Idaho! I’m bored to tears at work so I decided to check out your site on my iphone during lunch break. I love the knowledge you present here and can’t wait to take a look when I get home. I’m shocked at how quick your blog loaded on my mobile .. I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyways, fantastic site!

  16. The title is great and well done tackling this subject with your special focus on Western approaches to aging and especially how this affects woman.

    We dismiss or ignore the aging process at our own peril. “Nature is a holy text. Creation is the first scripture”. (Christine Valters Paintner).

    Nature can show us how aging fits into the necessary rhythms of life. Our work is to discern, absorb and practice what we can learn from these natural cyclical processes.

  17. Susan, I am so looking forward to your and Susan’s new book and A-Z blog posts on Western women and aging. Today I enjoyed a delightful and enlightening phone conversation with a long-time friend who lives in Southern California. She and I were both caregivers to our moms and discussed that and the aftermath, what we are doing now as aging Western women and how we think with that. We converse on subjects similar to what you and I and you and Susan discuss. I have told her about your “Lilith…” book — several times. Shall send her another link. I know she’d love it. I am so lucky to have such friends as you and she to think with.

    • Thank you Carol – I look forward to your comments! I remember your wise one last year when, although I had no theme, my topic in the A-Z 2013 was Aging (if I remember correctly!).
      Yes, friends ‘to think with’ .. the best! Good thinking encompasses good feeling.

  18. I am intrigued by the concept of Western women and aging… I shall look forward to reading more about your ideas….

  19. Susan….I loved your A to Z challenge series last year. I love your ideas for this year. I think it will be a BEAUTUFUL series. I have always loved reading about Lilith/Garden of Eden.

    Looking forward my dear friend….looking forward….

  20. Dear Susan;
    Thank you for this coming out announcement. We will see how it all evolves. New moon time now and auspicious? I love that word.
    On to the A to Z and then who knows? The mystery of unfolding…

    • Susan, so glad you received it! It was full moon this past Friday here in Johannesburg and I am sure when it is full moon here it is full moon everywhere? But, we are heading towards a new moon – even when emptying out things unfold.

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