My Friend the Wall and Hearing the Call

yogaimages

 This morning I attended yoga, the first time I’d been to a Thursday morning class. The teacher was new to me. Her class had been with her for about 8 years she told me so they were ‘advanced’. I was to go at my own pace. It was amazing to watch her go so gracefully into various poses and hold them. And the pupils too. 

Then it was the headstand. My late mother was a yoga teacher and I remembered that it was her policy that no pupil attempt the headstand until had they’d several years of training. So I sat and watched. The teacher’s execution was a delight. Grace in slow motion, balance and stillness. And most of the pupils did it effortlessly.

A pupil walked to the wall. ‘My friend the wall’, she said and performed the head stand balancing her legs against the wall. Of course being me I made all sorts of associations. Hitting our heads against brick walls we seemingly can’t get through. A wall of pain and grief. Walling ourselves in and not allowing our vulnerability to show. Building walls instead of bridges. On and on went my associations while I sat on my yoga mat watching others. 

Can a wall become a friend as it did for the yoga pupil who used the wall for balance? Can I break down walls and build bridges in myself and in the world? Can I befriend the wall and see it as an aspirational metaphor, using it as a stepping stone to break down my inner walls that keep me from my fullness of being?

On ‘Hearing the Call‘ : My son who was visiting for several days last week took back with him to Plettenberg Bay a small gift from me to his girlfriend. She called me yesterday to thank me. I asked whether there had been any sightings of whales in the bay. We’re flying down to Plett this coming Sunday. No, she said, she hadn’t seen or heard. Call them to come I said to her. She said she would when next running on the beach.

I checked my cell phone I’d left behind to charge when I returned home  after yoga for an urgent cup of coffee. The first message was from Amanda. She’d seen whales in the bay this morning while running! My heart did a little leap –

Am I suggesting that the whales heard Amanda’s call? No, not really.

What it did suggest to me so soon after my yoga class, was my need to break down the inner wall in order to better hear the call. To make a friend of it and invite it in. Use it for clambering and climbing. Paint those walls with my own inner deep recesses. See, sniff through the walls. Knock down those inner walls that keep me bound. 

Could the obstacle be the path?

I tried to find some photos of whales I’d taken a few years back but no luck. Hopefully I’ll be able to put up a photo or two next week.

Those leviathans of the deep always stir something deep inside me. I like to think that I hear better the call of the deep – 

Thank you for coming by and all good wishes. May the Force be with you.

 

48 Comments on My Friend the Wall and Hearing the Call

  2. I wrote a review for Amazon of Elaine’s book and also for Victor Mansfield’s Book.
    “Leaning” has many dimensions of
    significance when looked at more closely.

    I recommend reading or buying both books!

    Joe

  3. When we think of having our backs up against the wall, which we often feel is a good expression, I think we should also remember what Elaine wrote in her book, “LEANING into LOVE, a spiritual journey through grief.” On the back of Elaine’s book, DALE BORGLUM wrote, “…Elaine Mansfield’s Leaning into Love is a manual for healing that offers us the emotional and spiritual tools needed to grow and even flourish through life’s deepest crises.” Joe

  4. Hi Susan – yes, I don’t want to stand on my head … lots of stars appear and I hate to think what would happen next!

    Walls – I have to break them down now … and forget about anything else … cheers Hilary

    • A good enough reason not to stand on your head Hilary, or anyone else’s maybe 🙂

      I said above in reply to Elaine about having our backs up against the wall … sometimes in difficult times, sometimes as support. May your walls always provide support.

  5. Wonderful, Susan. I know about those inner walls and the power of synchronicity and meaningful simultaneities to open doors and windows in those walls.

    As I read, my first association with wall is something I can lean into, something to help me stand up, something for support. I lean into big trees (and other friends) for the same reasons.

    Ah, whales. Do you remember the post I wrote about creating a ritual of letting go for and with a friend on a CA beach. My son had taken us to this spot and helped us gather stones and shells. And then when she had completed her ritual, he shouted, “Whales! Whales!.” There they were breaching, blowing, and blessing my friend and all of us.

    (Very wise of you to forgo the headstand. I once had a warrior yoga teacher who refused to listen to his student’s hesitations and level of experience. I didn’t take another class from him.)

    • Thanks Elaine! A bit of a refrain at the moment is how we here in SA have had our backs up against the wall many times in the past. Poetically, economically, sociologically -Sometimes it takes just that very difficult situation to cause a breakthrough. Psychologically speaking also –

      I do remember your post about son and friend seeing whales while performing a ritual for letting go!

      We arrived in Plettenberg Bay today late afternoon … it was lovely to go walking in the cool of the evening. Who knows tomorrow we may sight them!

  6. Hi Susan:) glad to read this post, which brought me memories of learning yoga for the first time in my life, while I went to attend a lay theology course in Bangalore, India. we were taught yoga classes, and the head stand was not easy for me; so I was encouraged to take help from the wall and it worked for me:) Love the way you interpret and yes breaking down inner walls to build bridges makes a lot of sense to me at this moment. At home David loves to put up pictures on the wall, in every room he put up collage of my son photographs wanting to believe that he is still amidst us in our family, alive and happy… in the beginning It was very hurting for me to see his pictures every where, as it would bring tears and sadness in my heart. But today its something that I love to see and believe that he is with us, not gone away.. thanks for sharing. It evoked strong feelings in me and so nice to stay connected. Also loved the feeling of calling the whales…. sounds so sweet..

    • Thanks Genevieve for coming by. I am touched by the photographs of your sweet son being all over the walls as a constant reminder of both his presence and absence.

      Good on the wall being a help!

      We hope to see whales while here in Plett – we arrived today late afternoon. Have a great week 🙂

  7. Oh Susan, I absolutely LOVE your images about various uses of the Wall! You have such a delightful mind. Right now, I sure wish some of those images would veer over and appear in my mind!

    I LOVED your post! It has a GREAT CALLING!

    • Thanks Jacqui for coming by. The child pose is lovely, with legs tucked under thighs, arms outstretched in front, head ON the floor – very relaxing and allows downward flow of blood – this is sitting of course 🙂

  9. I have been contemplating yoga class as well. I did it a few years ago but have since lost my confidence in the whole physical balance thing and fear the repercussions of myself to self. Maybe I’ll give it another go soon!
    You are so wise to suggest she call the whales. I will remember that thought.

    • Balance has been and is a concern of mine Lesley, it isn’t as it used to be. An inner ear problem. But I plan to practice those poses, like in the tree pose, one leg then the other – one day I hope to not wobble!

      Have a lovely weekend!

  10. What a lovely and thoughtful post, Susan. I will be pondering walls and paths and whales.
    Walls make me think of a certain presidential candidate and his ridiculous statements.
    We went on a whale watching boat ride several years ago while visiting our daughter and her wife in Boston. We were fortunate to see several–mothers and babies. Glorious!

    • Thank you Merril. Yes the wall to trump all walls, paid for by the others, not by him.

      Mothers and babies! How fabulous! Have a lovely weekend 🙂

  11. I left my gentle yoga classes behind me when I moved from Virginia to Minnesota. But now I plan to take full advantage of the fitness facilities at St. John’s University. The reward comes when arms and legs both have more spring in them and when the tummy feels reasonably flat. For a grandma, at least.

    Loved the story about calling the whales. I have no trouble believing that magic and mystery bend to our will and imagination.

    • That’s so great that you’re going to use the facilities at St. John’s University Shirley. I love it when I feel freer, more limber, less restricted in my movements. More open to everything and to beginners mind, to use a phrase from your recent post. Shoulders straight, back straight while walking, swinging your arms about – I don’t care who sees me, I enjoy it so much! Thank you for coming by Shirley, I hope you’re settling in well in your new abode,

      It is rather magical about calling the whales. I was talking to a Zimbabwean gardener from the complex where I live. He asked me if I was going to do a rain dance any time soon. I told him last year or the year before that I had written a post about Queen Modjadji the Rain Queen and was going to do rain dances, which I did when the length between rains in our very hot weather got longer and longer. It was rather strange that he remembered this and asked me today . All of today has been rather wonderful come to think of it!

  12. I was into a restively deep comment, when I lost it. Please let me know if you received anything. I was fairly emotional…LOL! Got a lot out of this piece. Thank you, Susan.

    • Sorry you lost your original comment Marsha – It happens. But I’m glad you got a lot out of this … and thank you very much for coming by.

  14. Powerful imagery and associations, Susan, I love this post. It gave me goosebumps… I’ve been frustrated lately with that inner wall because I am struggling to fully breakthrough and hear the call. But your post gave me a fresh perspective. Perhaps I can listen from where I am, because the intention of that inner wall is probably friendly, it just it has a limited usefulness now… A wonderful post and I loved that Amanda saw whales, and given how woo woo I can get at times, I even can believe that they heard her.

    • Thank you for coming by Gulara and acknowledging that inner wall … that’s the first step I reckon? The next is just as hard though in my own experience 🙂 But I try to be friendly towards it.

      I also think it’s quite possible that the whales heard the call from Amanda. She knows how much I want to see whales and she would have made an earnest call on my behalf.

      May the walls come down and may you find the space to hear and heed the call.

  15. As always, I like your philosophical musings, but you picture of yoga poses reminds me to get back into my Pilates classes. I think of Pilates as a close cousin to yoga, but whether I’m right or not, I need to get back into a regular exercise routine.

    The move has thrown me off kilter. Some self-care is in order now that we’re more or less settled. Thank you, Susan!

    • Thanks Marian, pilates is similar to yoga. When I first started at the gym at the beginning of last month, I thought the first class I attended was a yoga class, but it was a pilates class. My first pilates ever. I could barely walk the next day. I attend both yoga and pilates now – both are very rewarding. I am feeling the changes in body and mind and I’m glad I’m self-caring. Glad to hear you’re settling and may exercise take centre stage for you soon!

  16. I love this paragraph:

    “What it did suggest to me so soon after my yoga class, was my need to break down the inner wall in order to better hear the call. To make a friend of it and invite it in. Use it for clambering and climbing. Paint those walls with my own inner deep recesses. See, sniff through the walls. Knock down those inner walls that keep me bound.”

    It’s time for a change. Opening up, making space, allowing the walls to rise and shift as I gently knock them down. Then soon, the inner freedom we seek becomes a reality.

    Excellent article my dear.
    Shalom aleichem,
    Patricia

  17. Building bridges and connecting people was my compulsion for many years – a rewarding experience, and hard work. Presently my imagination needs the sanctuary of a secret walled garden.

    Did you come upon Marlen Haushofer’s novel, Die Wand? translated as The Wall? Fascinating. A film was made of it as well.

    Re: headstands. I used to do them. All walls in my home support something, bookshelves, furniture, pictures. Spurned by your post, I tried one of the doors, but though I have a flexible body, I felt I lacked confidence. Practicing again, slowly might be the answer, but maybe I should I stick to my stretching exercises and gentle Feldenkreis movements.

    • Ah, the Secret Walled Garden! This reminds me of the secret and sacred space I built in my garden many years ago in our old home.

      Thanks Ashen for coming by. I don’t know the book or the film, The Wall? The Beriln Wall?

      I had coffee with a good friend the other morning who tells me that she does Feldenkreis with one of only two practitioners here in SA. I was trying to remember the name and now here you say it! She says it is wonderful. I will google it. Go easy on those head stands!

  18. The first time I saw whales was in Maui. I cried, so I guess they moved something in me too. You just feel very, very lucky to be able to witness something that incredible. Beautiful creatures.

    I love your anthology about the wall. Can we make walls our friends? It’s an interesting thing to ponder.

    • Thanks J.H. for coming by. How lovely to hear you had such a response in Maui! It just does something to me too …

      Maybe one day I’ll write about Lyall Watson, late biologist from SA who wrote a book called ‘Elephantoms’ and in it said about his research into elephants from the Knysna forest (near Plettenberg Bay) communicating with whales far down there in the sea …

    • For many years I wouldn’t have curtains in our old house until my late father-in-law said ‘it’s about time’ and my friends thought this was way too odd. My poor husband too. And there’s a special kind of joy with pictures up on the walls I guess, and being with family, warmly ensconced in the safety of walls .. Thanks for coming by Arlee 🙂 But thanks heavens for Mother Nature and her lack of walls –

  21. Great post, Susan! I’m a yoga teacher though I don’t teach and don’t even practice as regularly as I should, but your rumination about the headstand struck a deep note – while I was doing my TT in Manhattan everyone in the class could do it – but for me. It made me ashamed and sad. It was much later that I read in a yoga text that the headstand is not meant for those who have had neck injuries – and I have had 3. Also, that the shoulder stand gives you 70% of the benefit of the headstand. And I realized that my body had an intelligence that my ego did not have…much love, my friend, keep writing and much love, Mira

    • Your comment is so lovely Mira thank you! What is TT in Manhattan? I’m imagining teacher training. Why am I not surprised that you are a yoga teacher? It’s so lovely to hear of your reading about headstands not for those with neck injuries and that the shoulder stand is 70% effective. I’m learning about the intelligence of my body in a different after a long while of no yoga. Walking has been my form of exercise which I love, though with sore toes for last two months its not been the most comfortable. But even this I am now doing, Thank you sweet and dear friend. Love, Susan.

  22. Thank you, Susan, for this wound reminder that walls can be friends, but that we must try to break though them when they become barriers to understanding and growth!

    • Thank you Stephen for coming by. I wonder if you meant ‘wonderful’ reminder instead of ‘wound’ reminder. Whichever way it makes me think of the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem, so ancient and sacred, wounded by its desecration by the Romans in 70 AD, and wonderfully a pilgrimage of prayer.

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