These are brief extracts from Susan E Schwartz’s and my recently released book “Aging & Becoming ~ A Reflective Enquiry”. Susan E. Schwartz is represented as SES; I’m SS – italicised. Page numbers are given. This is from Chapter: ‘Eros & Emotion’

SES: Without Eros a relationship with life itself ends. We cannot really eliminate Eros as long as we are alive. Yet we are in a paradox and admit that aging requires energy and focus. Age cannot be without Eros. The evening of life can also be enervating. We are engaged in continual forms of ending and beginning. There can be extenuating circumstances that narrow the playing field and cause us, and should cause us, to evaluate where, and how to focus our energy and time. pg 44

SS: It is comforting to know that truth can emerge from error. … To err is not necessarily a sign of weakness. It may be an expression of our all too real humanness, an expression of our vulnerabilities, insecurities and doubts. pg 47

‘Lock up your libraries if you like; but there is no gate, no lock, no bolt that you can set upon the freedom of my mind’.

Virginia Woolf 

33 Comments on April AtoZ E Eros

  1. When I saw the word Eros, I thought of the Greek god of love, but I’m guessing from the context that’s not what’s meant. 🙂 It is comforting, the idea of erring being a sign of our humanity, or even an opportunity to learn. Isn’t always easy to remember though, it the midst of it all.

  2. Hi its a pleasure to be here reading your posts, which are enlightening, and I have started enjoying the comments of my other friends here too… each of us responding to different aspects of the posts. As we journey along with the age comes the wisdom and expertise that gives us not only confidence but a desire to be in control of everything in our lives…and we try our best to hide our fears and insecurities… and not to err means I am strong enough to deal with challenges and I am perfect. As you rightly shared to err means expression of of our humanness … vulnerabilities … .. like the way you have put it SS… I am still thinking 🙂

    • Thanks Genevive for coming by – the comments are lovely from others and makes the A-Z or any other kind of blogging, so worthwhile as you say, seeing things from different perspectives.
      Have a lovely weekend! 🙂 x

  3. Hi Susan – I commented… did it disappear … I’ll be back later. I hope the march is peaceful … with thoughts – Hilary

  4. Hi Susan – hope all goes well today in peace and understanding. I’m finding out so much about life now – we can learn so much … illness and serious hospitalisation for elderly – our need to comfort and be there for them; my own appreciation of getting older through their eyes; the learning I’m doing because our brains need to expand and keep alive … alive for ourselves and aware and full of opportunity for others.

    Eros – so important to living on, having knowledge to give back, and improve ourselves in many ways … fascinating post – cheers Hilary

    • Almost two weeks late in responding to you comment Hilary, apologies! It’s true that we seem to be more in touch with our lives and those of others, and being there for those who need our assistance in some way or the other. As you say ‘…having knowledge to give back and improve ourselves in many ways…’ Thank you, Susan

  5. “aging requires energy and focus.” Yes, and it’s a different type of energy than the energy associated with youth.
    This energy is more ‘relaxed’… if that makes sense…it comes from wisdom and experience.

  6. You hit one of my hotspots, Susan: To err is not a sign of weakness. That is a lesson I try (very hard) to impress on students. Success comes from failure.

  7. Susan’s Schwartz’s comment “Without Eros your relationship with life ends” is thought-provoking. At first I took the comment literally, but now that I think about it how one spends their aging years is varied. I have known of seniors who once they retired never adjusted nor ventured out to seek a different life. Instead they plopped in a chair and vegetated. They lived, but they didn’t.

    Also, “to err” may be important to our lives. It makes us see alternatives and can bring on adjustment and change. Sadly, we often see the error of our ways until too late. But I suppose seeing the error even late is better than not seeing it at all.

    Life is like that “box of chocolates” that Forrest Gump talked about. We never know what we will get.

    I love your short posts. I’ll bet they are much easier on you too! Enjoy!

    • Thanks Gwynn so much for coming by. Our autumnal years can be full of potential and promise if one is not too severely debilitated by illness and such. Though there could be inner seasonal changes also with promise and potential for one so incapacitated –

      Yes, if the ‘error’ is recognised that does not mean that things are hopeless irrespective of the stage of one’s life. Many of us refuse to see any (usually egoic) errors of ourselves..

      Yes these shorter posts suit me well – though a lot of work putting them up!

    • I do too Susan … even as I re-read them and others’ comments I continue to value them – thank you for coming by.

  8. Hi Susan, Of late I’ve read that we never truly found out the real consequences of getting it wrong in life until much later, sometimes decades later … as failure and fate often will move us closer to where we really need to be.

    Unexpectedly in mid-life, we frequently leave our partners, walk away from long-term friendships in order to find a new tribe, our very own … a place where love, and Eros plays the signature tune … far, far away from the realms of ego.

    On the subject of other lands I’m off on my travels soon till the end of the April so will have to catch up with you on my return. In the meantime I hope your A-Z blogging challenge goes well. Warm wishes to you, Deborah.

    • Yours is such a lovely comment Deborah thank you. I drew attention to it in my comment to Reeyah. And again, what you say ‘…failure and fate will often move us closer to where we really need to be’ is a hard truth but I think it is true; if we stay stuck in the mud, unable to move beyond, then there is no movement. Too much ego can and does get in the way. Loosening it up is never easy.

      How lovely to be setting off on an adventure! I wish you well! May you have happy landings wherever you go – and return -Thank you for your good wishes for the A-Z. Thank you also for being such a wonderful and important support. Warm wishes to you. Go safely. Susan xx

      • Thank you for your lovely reply too! We’re leaving Saturday, so need to finish my Hanged Man (Tarot) poem by tomorrow! Although still time enough for me to read your letter “F” tomorrow … wondering what it will be, can’t wait! xx

  9. I’m really enjoying the end quotes you are using… reminds me of the german song that was banned by Hitler, Die Gedanken sind Frei

    • Although I don’t know this song banned by Hitler, the fact that it was banned and that it ties in with Virginia Wool’s quote makes me think it’s a protest song. Good. Relevant right now in my neck of the woods. A march is planned tomorrow, and we believe it will be the largest of its kind … we’re taking to the streets in protest …

  10. This line struck me: “We are engaged in continual forms of ending and beginning.”

    I agree. The endings suck, but we must acknowledge the endings because they give way to beginnings. Too often people forget this (I know I have for a bit), so it’s good to be reminded that the end is also a beginning. 🙂

    • Endings – so Essential. Sometimes they’re rough, sometimes smooth, sometimes painful, sometimes a release, sometimes expected other times totally unexpected – I’m still to respond to Deborah’s comment above about ‘…getting it wrong in life until much later, sometimes decades later … as failure and fate often will move us closer to where we really need to be’. Nice ‘F’ words 🙂 … and the rest of her comment is lovely too, re the need to be in touch with Eros, the life-force. Men too … and to recognise that endings and beginnings are continually happening and the need to engage in them … thank you for coming by Reeyah 🙂

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